Quite often, when we think of Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), the various Parts, and the Self, we consider the more obvious ways the Parts communicate that they are there. For example, Parts can cause intrusive thoughts, disturbing images in the mind, feelings that are difficult to manage, and even strange body sensations. However, the Parts also have the ability to communicate in ways that the individual’s Self is completely unaware of.
If you are a trauma victim, you may have experienced this phenomenon. You may also find it troubling. However, by learning more about this method of communication, you can improve the way you understand your Parts, what they are trying to tell you, and how that relates to your Self.
Finding the Evidence of the Parts’ Actions
The Parts can communicate in a myriad of ways and through multiple actions. Here are just a few examples:
- Finding yourself standing in the middle of the kitchen in the middle of the night without remembering the walk there.
- Waking up to find that you have spent the night sleeping on the floor, rather than in your normal bed.
- “Zoning out” in front of the television and not realizing it until several hours have passed.
It is normal to feel embarrassed or even ashamed when you learn about something you did without being aware of it. However, learning about these actions should never detract from the important work that is completed within the Internal Family Systems model of trauma therapy.
Maintaining Your Curiosity
It is common and completely understandable to want to forget all about embarrassing things when they happen. But for someone who is a trauma survivor, it is vitally important to maintain a sense of curiosity about that action. That way, it is possible to create empathy and understanding for the Part that is attempting to communicate through it.
An IFS Trauma Therapist is the best person to guide this process, and they do so by asking vital questions, such as:
- “If you keep finding yourself in the kitchen in the middle of the night, what Part do you think wanted to go there, and why?”
- “If there is a pattern of waking up on the floor, what Part might feel more comfortable there instead of your usual bed?”
- “If you continually find your mind drifting off for hours while you are trying to relax and watch TV, what Part might be dissociating?”
Questions like these help the Parts feel heard and cultivate an environment of understanding that positively contributes to the overall healing process is a multitude of ways.
The Case for “Unblending” the Parts
Not always, in some cases, blended Parts can be dangerous for trauma victims. This is why going through the proper steps to unblend them is so vitally important. Parts that feel depressed, hopeless, and afraid pose a risk to the Self because they may attempt to sabotage relationships, jobs, and other aspects of life. All with “good intentions”!
Trauma therapy focused on the IFS model can help by guiding clients through the process of learning how to not identify with their Parts, but to see them as separate aspects in need of understanding and empathy.
Healing is possible, I can help. Please contact me today to make an appointment.
