When a client who has gone through a traumatic experience first begins dealing with the aftermath of that experience, their internal world is nothing short of chaos. That chaos continues until the proper form of therapy is received to help them begin the healing process.
The Internal Family Systems model of therapy focuses on identifying and utilizing both the Normal Life Self (also known as Self) and the Parts (which could refer to a Child Part, Anger Part, etc.). The key to beginning and continuing healing is to guide and teach clients’ Selves to work with the Parts.
Observation Vs. Reactivity
One of the reasons many trauma victims seek out therapy is because they have become extremely reactive. In other words, the Self has completely lost control and the various Parts are the ones calling all the shots. This reactivity can easily dissolve into internal chaos, leaving the client feeling helpless and hopeless.
That is why the very first step in IFS Therapy is to assist the client with identifying and understanding the Self and how it differs from the Parts. Once that understanding has been reached, the client can be instructed on how to observe, rather than react.
Once the Self begins observing in an attempt to sympathize and comprehend the Parts instead of taking charge of them, that internal chaos will start to subside. That is due to the fact that ultimately, the Parts are only seeking to be understood and heard.
Validation Vs. Shaming
Many trauma victims begin therapy with intense feelings of shame about their emotions, behaviors, and thoughts. A key role of the Self is to arrest any type of shaming and begin to focus on validating what the Parts have to say. This process involves a few different steps:
- Naming feelings and beliefs that the Parts are experiencing.
- Confirming what the parts are going through.
This can be tricky at times; especially when the Self has no memory of something one of the Parts is explaining. It is important to remember that dissociative memory loss is quite normal, and there are ways around it. For example, by working with their therapist, the client can attempt to identify clues that can help with the validation process. Together, they may uncover things like:
- Internet search histories
- Emails that were written
- Receipts for purchases that were made
The more the Self gets to know each of the Parts, the easier it will become to identify which actions were most likely tied to them. However, the therapist will continue to play a critical role in this area as well. Therapists can help by asking the right questions and refocusing the client to focus on the Parts themselves rather than the chaos they appear to be causing.
Interested in IFS Trauma Therapy?
The IFS Model of trauma therapy has helped so many people heal after living through traumatic events. If you have tried other methods without success, I’d like to invite you to contact me for a consultation.
Healing is possible, and I can help.
